Trusted you with my heart
How could you lead me Wrong
Won’t cry even know my heart
Heavy, my heart isn’t
Something you misuse guess my
Love isn’t worth it probably my
Karma from cheating on that girl
Won’t trip know I deserve it just wish
It didn’t hurt when I love done gave
You all of me just for you to tell me
It wasn’t enough. Been through
hell & back loving the wrong women
How could you mislead me thought
You wanted forever
hurt to say I had real
Love for you fuck it now no more love
Left in my heart smoking forgetting all our
Memories can’t believe you lead me wrong
Shame on me for letting love blind me. How could you lead me to my doom shame on me for letting love blind me thought you loved me, girl
Now my heart leaking lead me wrong my heart all torn hate love songs want to know why you lead a nigga too his doom got me writing bout how much I dislike you could never hate anyone no matter how bad you do me wanna see everybody win just not at my table text messages from you asking can we talk ain’t nun to speak about had to block your crazy ass how we turn from lover too strangers lead me wrong won’t speak on our situation know what you did kept it real on my end. Can’t believe you lead me wrong fuck you fuck love  lead a nigga too his doom baby heart broken yungeen hate love songs just want real love guess that’s too much to ask for so I’ll just thug it out.

Yours Truly
- برينتون نيكولاس

I can’t help but fall,
Every time I see you,
Those eyes, your silly grin,
The way you do quirky things,
Every word you say and all you do.

These feelings are hard to describe.
I can’t help but smile every time you cross my mind,
I get this giddy feeling inside,
And find myself grinning wide.

You’re the cure to my heart,
The way you light up my monochrome world with your shine,
Oh the way you chase away the sadness from my life,
I can’t help but smile when I see those perfect eyes.

Thinking of those eyes and your charming smile,
Your contagious laugh and your playful style,
The way you do adorable things, so cute,
And how your eyes light up when you do.
Oh the way I love all those small things,
No, I love just everything about you.

I think I’m in love with someone who doesn’t exist.

P.S. Dedicated to all my fictional crushes 💀
(I THINK I’M GOING CRAZY- in love=)

Double crossed by people I thought loved me crazy thing is I saw the fuck shit didn’t wanna believe it was supposed to hold me down like my spine my fault for thinking everybody loyal like me got bitches on my line who want me for the sex but who gonna cherish me looking for love in a dark place swear it’s only getting worse cause I’m older tired of these hoes want me a real one tired of popping these perks stomach in my back right now cause I’m craving them tens can’t shake the feeling got duck tape on my wounds reopening every wound heart full of pain glad to be a stoic enduring all this pain wondering if God listening cause every time I make that prayer for you to remove all the negativity from my life you expose all the fakes in a matter of seconds shit get deep like watching your friend die in front of your face seen my death in my dreams hope it’s painless hope they don’t cry for me don’t worry I’m not weak won’t go to the park & end it all I’m too alive just know it’s dark again love the rain know I don’t mind the pain it’s all apart of life she a bitch who love slow dancing in the rain
& I’m out here with her asking her the fuck you want from me heart all black like the pavement still in the streets like the lines in the road miss all my brother who up the road still round the same niggas who taught me everything it’s still never  leave my brothers till my heart flat line
Can’t believe my dawg died who .gonna help sis raise them kids
This my heart in these pages pouring my whole heart out won’t lie in these pages promise to get deeper & create something beyond your wildest dreams thank you for
reading.

Yours truly
- برينتون نيكولاس.

Would you be scared?
If you saw me jump off a bridge.
Would you run and try to save me or stand there and watch?
Would you be scared?
If you saw me drawing red lines on myself with a knife.
Would you hide and watch or tell me to stop?
Would you be scared?
If you saw a group of guys trying to take advantage of me.
Would you stand there and watch or try to tell them to stop?
Would you be scared?
If you saw me trying to hang myself.
Would you just peek through the door and watch me suffocate or save my life?
Would you be scared?
If you found me dead in the woods.
Would you walk away from my body or tell people you found me?
No sorry, The real question is,
Would you save me?

You tell me you love me yet you can’t answer me.

Would you save my life?
If you saw a group of guys beating me up
Would you run up and tell them to stop or stand there in watch?
Would you call me a punk?
If I told you these girls took advantage of me.
Would I still be your #1?
Would you be there for me?
If you saw me crying alone?

Yes.

There’s a difference between you and me.
I never told you ”I loved you” yet I still try to show it.
But you, you just say that you love me. Yet you never show it.

do you know what really hurts
when you talk to someone for days
and have the best conversation with them
even small talks
talking to them made my whole day
then one day
they act like you never exist
and you left there trying to figure out
what you did wrong
then you doubt yourself
EVERY fucking time

Tease me


Tease me baby don’t
Want to fuck yet four
Play for awhile licking
All type of cream & syrup
Off you put that lingerie
On baby pose for the
Camera looking so
Lovely know I love
That pussy bald like
Caillou please me
baby no hands baby
Swallow it all look me
In my eyes while I drown
don’t mind drowning
Baby brought a long board hope
You can handle these inches baby
Please me all these messages got
Me rock hard tease me baby send some nude let me see them curves
Drive me crazy sending all type of dick picture to you tease me baby
Can’t wait to dive deep in hope it’s everything you say it is baby please me hope you please me deep stroking you grabbing your throat driving deeper thought that was all of me baby please me ride me
Do a split on this dick treat it like a sit & spin baby bounce all over this dick please me baby throw that Azz back shake that azz like you being doing in them videos all that Azz moving like jelly got me ready fill you up with cream  please me baby can’t wait to fuck you again baby give you death strokes kill the pussy every time she not even my girl but I’m fucking her like I’ve been loving her my whole life
Only make that pussy cry never her eyes please me baby gotta high sex drive for the right girl gotta tease me baby don’t want it too easy make me work for it tease me give me blue balls got me ready even more kissing you so passionate picking you up got you against the wall feel the warmth from your pussy ain’t got no draws
On in these leggings feel the wetness
Toss you on the bed see it in your eyes twist up your hair bow down to me pull these pants down grab this dick it belong to you now take your time don’t like a rushed job want you make love to my dick swirl
That tongue up and down kiss that head tease me and just play with the head of my dick stroke that dick while you suck my balls one by one smack it in your face come here let me taste you swear you taste like water fall in love with each lick got
Me smacking my lips feasting
Like this my last meal face all messy
Whole bed turn to a splash park my Lor ocean spray love watching that pussy squirt all over the places love pleasing you baby you teased me been long enough now watch you love it here.

Sincerely yours.

برينتون نيكولاسي

YOU

YOU just don’t know the type
Shit I deal with on the regular
Mad at me cause I didn’t allow
YOU to play in my face like
Finger paint not with the fussing
YOU can lie to
Someone else ruin someone
else’s this heart of mine to pure
happiness in a pen and a
Pad loving myself can’t be
Wasting my youth on wasted
Love YOU were almost my
Soft spot till the spot harden
most valuable pretender
Award goes to YOU didn’t know
YOU moved like that so glad to be away see YOU for what YOU are peace signs out the window
Good riddance on to the next chapter in my life and you aren’t involved got my own shit to deal with trying move out the city cause them carbs in a barrel keep trying pull me down trying duck a indictment don’t want to lose my freedom cause one these weirdos pillow kicking to me about another man business won’t catch me being no Wendy Williams
Ain’t no gossip girl the difference between me & YOU is I was raised by cold hearted killers & trappers bunch of gang members round me learned the game early seen niggas throw they whole life away for a dollar better save your money for a lawyer cause they going try and throw YOU under the jail hope your bitch really love you cause when shit get hard she’ll be fucking your partner she fuck around and be on the phone with you with another nigga dick in her mouth taking back shot hurrying up off the phone now you mad calling back to back clutching your gun on your way to her house to kill everybody YOU just don’t know what someone doing behind your back watch your own spine don’t put nothing pass nobody it’s a cold world love yourself correct might get YOU some true love out here YOU just don’t know someone intentions everybody ain’t YOU
remember that.

Forever Yours
- برينتون نيكولاس

Time away


Time away something that’s needed me myself & I no freak bitches deleting all the threads fuck all them conversations it’s a new me approaching get to know the new me can’t come around no fraudulent vibes don’t show me a vibe you can’t maintain stop lying leave while the door open know I can be insecure know I’m hurtful with my words hope I don’t destroy your ego even know you took my mind away needed to getaway know my love pure made mistakes brainwashed myself smoking all this weed became lazy maybe it’s the people around me not doing much with they life mad at me when we link not inviting nobody rather be alone talking about where the freaks tired of freaks not into easy pussy give me your inner thoughts feed me knowledge give me chills when you come around fuck sex can I lay on your thighs tell you everything that took my heart away tell you about my son name hopefully you like it Dushane Greyson Harrell
See his face in my dreams hope to have a family don’t want no baby mama drama want someone forever lost to many good girls turned them all cold made my bed now I’ll lay on the bed full of nails don’t worry the pain I’ve been through can handle anything God throw my way know what came with the choices I’ve made in my life needed be more dependable be a man of my word be forgetting I even said shit smoke and forget everything just some random words on my mind not digging deep in my soul see my pain in my eyes my momma I sad the other day death comes for us all in the end I’m ready whenever my time comes hope I made a impact on someone life hope you see my thoughts when you close yours eyes only for awhile I swear to come back with something deeper hope you can wait for me if not I understand hope I’m your favorite hope your never give up on me just needed give my mind a break needed get away phone on leave me alone be watching my phone ring playing sleep not into conversations sitting in a dark room with my thoughts opening every page of my mind rewinding watching old memories like I can relive them wish some my friends didn’t die wish my friends didn’t have life in the can hope my brother make it out alive heard he in there fight for his life heard his mind all fucked up my nigga smoked some laced weed had his mind racing I pray my Dawg shake back shit getting crazier more bodies dropping it’s closer to home lost my brother won’t say Rest In Peace still want go to a funeral don’t want see nobody cold wanna see you smiling saying مارفن they really don’t know me they calling me Mar don’t like the new company I’ve been keeping leaches snakes in disguise been letting mother fuckers trick me out my spot playing with my intelligence like I didn’t already peep you hope you know I’m not mad disappointed in myself for holding on so long don’t know how to love & honestly feel like nobody for me cause what I want seem so hard to find someone who loves to talk start the intimacy my love language is deep talks touching & someone who gives hundred percent don’t leave me in the blind that’ll have me overthinking negative thoughts swallowing my mind got me in my feelings cutting you off don’t want any stress don’t want to add on with someone else bullshit when I’m already walking through the storm myself can’t give you my umbrella I’m finally drying off getting closer to my home paradise almost free only for awhile I’ll miss you too don’t worry I’ll hit you here & there maybe don’t want to lie to you so don’t quote me on that cause I’m at peace all alone so please don’t disturb me I’ll back in awhile just need some time away hope you know I’m cleaning my mind
it’s tainted ruined in better perspective leaving wasn’t easy but it’s only for a while I’ll see you soon promise to stay strong understand if you can’t hold on be everything you deserve the stars & every planet in the Galaxy never settle for less don’t look pass any red flags protect your heart don’t give in so easily love yourself don’t be so prideful get out your head time to move forward don’t look back any more fuck them past relationships friendships whatever live stress free be great love self travel invest open your mind see you soon.

Your Truly.

‎برينتون نيكولاسي

I got attached and used to.
You. How cruel.

Never thought you’d resent me,
But l’ve accepted reality as it wants to be.

Never thought you’d hate me.
Did you know how much your words got to me?

I never thought I’d take anyone’s opinion so seriously.
But for you, I shed a tear quietly.

What did I do?
Nothing to deserve this.

We were close,
I was always nice to you,
But you’d say bad things about me, without me to your crew.

You couldn’t even take a photo with me on your last day?
Do you regret your way?

You gave me a message on how you don’t talk to me but you’ve loved me.
What stupid profanity?
Who do you think you are to rip me apart so carelessly?

It took me a year to finally say that I deserve better.
To you, my feelings didn’t matter.

If you ever change your mind and decide you wanna be friends,
That you wanna make amends,
Just know it already came to an end.

I waited a year for you to reach out,
But you didn’t do anything, more than about.

Every time, I got a chat request I hoped it would be you.
Insanity and hurt would come when I found out the truth.
Why’d you make me lose?

Its been a year and now I finally know I deserve better.
It’s been a hassle.

Before no matter how hard I tried,
I wanted to be close to you.
My self respect defied.

Don’t you think I liked you too much to think I deserved your brutality?
When you forgot about me.
Acted like my enemy.

I was at least your friend.
Wasn’t I?
Or was that also in my mind?

You changed like that,
It was too fast to properly react.
I really thought we had something worth more than that.
You were the only one who had enough of me to break my heart.

And guess what?
You did.

I should’ve known,
You weren’t the right person to have in my life all along.

It’s over,
If you ever truly change,
I’ll forgive you but I won’t forget.
Because I deserve better.

Thought you were different


Thought you were different till i asked you what you were doing hung up so quickly damn thought you were different called you back you rejected my call thought you were different thought you were faithful had a feeling you was like this kept asking for space long hours without hearing from you knew something wasn’t right when you wasn’t texting back talking bout you were was sleeping but was watching my stories thought you loved me guess my love isn’t worth shit too you thought you were different pains me too say i blame myself for you cheating what I do wrong why you leave me jaded hide my pain with a smile you left me heartless so many woman did me wrong but you cut me the deepest thought you were different why you ain’t say you wanted too see other people why you make me look stupid for loving you thought you were a safe place disturbed my peace got me up all night smoking tryna to forget every moment thought you were different pains me too say I still think of you seen you text on insta deleted it so quickly can’t come back here won’t fool me twice thought you were different fuck I look like loving ona hoe ass bitch talking bout the liquor bitch stop all the cap girl you ain’t different.

yours truly

‎برينتون نيكولاسي

Don’t look at me
Don’t stare
Those glares
And those sneers
Your whispers
Your words
Like a sword

The way you look at me
The way you’re whispering
The way you’re giggling
I know nothing’s real
Just my twisted fantasy

And I know no one’s staring
No one’s glaring
And those sneers
Those whispers
Those words
Aren’t meant for me
But I can’t shake this feeling
I can’t stop my trembling
And I start stammering

My mind goes blank
I forget walking
Forget talking
And I gasp for air
Because I forget to breathe
No, I can’t shake this feeling
And I can’t stop my trembling.

But I know, I know
Those stares
Those glares
Those sneers
Those whispers
Those words
Are just my twisted fantasy
Yet no, I can’t shake this feeling
It holds me in its grip, you see,
This twisted fantasy
My anxiety.

Those words
Those eyes
Those pretty, pretty lies
Your face
Your smile
Your honey-dripping voice
I know they’re all my imagination
Because I don’t deserve
Any of those compliments

You tell me
I am pretty
I am cute
I am perfect
I am everything
And I have everything
You ever wished for
But couldn’t get
I want to believe
Believe all those
Pretty, pretty
Lies.

I don’t want to be this way
I just want to feel okay
I don’t know what I should say
Or do
I don’t want to loathe
Myself
And I just want to run away
From all the pain
Fears
Tears
Regrets
Mistakes
I want to disappear
And never feel this way.

My insecurity
My anxiety
Won’t let me breathe
Won’t let me feel okay
Won’t let me believe
Those pretty, pretty
Lies,
Or truths?


Dedicated to you Dear Anxiety :|




#poetrycontestbyI.B

When you look in my eyes and tell me I’m beautiful.
Will you do the same in front of your friends at all costs?

Will I still be the one you want when the world is watching?
Will you still hold me when your ex’s parents walk in?

Tell me I’m in all your dreams,
Tell me I’m the reason you breathe.

Will you do it in front of everyone and when there’s no one?

I think about it too often.
But will I be the one when everyone and no one is watching?

Will I still be your prize when I’m close to fifty nine?
Will you tell your friends that I’m your life?

Will I be enough for you, with the blinds closed and in front of judging eyes?
In front of strangers, will you say that you never need to see the northern lights because you are holding the sight?

Will I be enough for you when everyone and no one is watching?

When your hurt, will you call on my name on the edge of time?
Will you do the same when your family stay the night?

Will I be enough for you when everyone and no one is watching?